Votes

(This is a repeat explanation from last week)

Hello, this is Rose here. Actually, it’s Dewy. ;) Let me explain. When I started blogging it was as Dewy Knickers. She’s a sexy, sassy, fun loving girly-girl with world famous rounded assets. Her job is as a reporter for HBNN, (Hysterical Blogger News Network). She travels the world and posts reports that are newsworthy but with a tongue-in-cheek approach. After I came forward publicly, I took the name Rose at first and then Rose Dewy Knickers. Rose, that’s me, writes all the poetry and short stories. Dewy is a character I play at times. She is a facet or aspect of my personality as a multiple. If there is any confusion still, just ask me in a comment or email.

Sunday Scribblings offers the weekly prompt of ‘decision’.

“Voice Of Reason”

“Hello world! This is Dewy Knickers, the voice of reason, this afternoon reporting from Columbus Ohio, the home of The Ohio State Fair. It’s 90 degrees under partly cloudy skies and the grounds are packed with eager fair goers. I’ve been here since the gates opened and it’s been a whirlwind of activities. I started my day off by hoofing it over to the Voinovich Livestock Center for a beef show. I was very disappointed when I realized the the beef was the four-legged variety and not beefcake.”

“After my initial dismay had settled, I parked my rounded assets on the bleachers. Don’t you think there should be better seating at the fair? Who wants to carry around a cushion all day anyway? Unless you are fortunate enough to have a handsome hunky guy to do your every bidding and desire. Let me know ladies, when you have a family outing, does your hubby serve as a pack mule?”

“Speaking of mules, haven’t seen any yet, but I had a decision to make this morning. Should I milk the time by going to the Cooper Arena and watch the Jr. Holsteins? Of cut it close at the Brown Arena for the Jr. and Open Sheep Shearing contest? In the end, that decision was no contest at all. As much as I enjoy a cold, thick, rich, creamy milkshake, I’d had enough of cow dung for this day already. Sheep it was!”

“Ladies and gentlemen, the smell of sawdust and lanolin permeated the warm morning air as the faint bleating of the woolly victims could be heard from somewhere nearby. The contestants, the humans that is, were as tense as their adversaries as they, the sweaters with hoofs, gazed balefully at the sharp implements in their, the humans hands. The strident bell rang and in a flurry of activity the first participant was abruptly seized and slung onto the shearing table.”

“I have to admit to a sense of awe at the speed to which each sheep was carefully and, for the most part, safely removed of its bounty. Style and accuracy counted as well and when the wool settled, the judges had made their decision. The crowd applauded loudly as the winners received their ribbons and the now naked sheep were returned to the pens.”

“After my busy morning, I am now off to partake of the best part of any fair, the Midway. With all the food choices a girl could possibly want. This has been Dewy Knickers, for HBNN from the Ohio State Fair. See you on the Ferris Wheel.”

By Rose Dewy Knickers, August 3rd, 2007

This is a fictional report of course as we live in Florida, but this is the scheduled events for Aug. 3rd. 😀

25 thoughts on “Votes

  1. you would have your sunday scribbling ready already,.,, i just got in from work and saw the prompt… i am really enjoying this commentary… and while you are at the fair… could you pick me up apack mule and a hot crispy funnel cake loaded with powdered sugar?????? oh i just love fair food!!!!!!

  2. I love ya girl– Sorry I haven’t been around much, it’s been a wild summer– when things slow down, I promise I’ll catch up with ya! *hugs and love*

  3. Fairs are on everyone’s minds right now, our fairgrounds are sprucing up the joint and kicking the swap market people out for the next month. Scones with strawberries, I’d have.

    Sheep were a good choice, Dewey, with no beefcake, the would probably just be a bunch of smelly old cows trying to nose their way into your life anyway.

  4. Morning Paisley. 🙂 I am fortunate that I can write while Brian works. We lurv funnel cakes. As for the mules, only saw snotty young ones.

    ((((Christy)))

    It’s been a wild summer for everyone. When you get off the roller coaster, we’ll talk.

    Marcia,

    You are so right. Who needs an old cow when you can have a naked sheep. 😉

    Mardougrrl, never been to a fair???? You have got to go! It is wonderful. Listen to the Voice Of Reason!

    Welcome Redness, if there is anything that Dewy knows, it is bull. 😉

    Rose

    xo

  5. Do you know that Edgar Allen Poe used to do these kinds of stories covering events? I have to find the info but I remember one about a hot air balloon…

  6. You have such a talent for writing and I love everything you write! You really capture visual details, atmosphere, feelings and dialogue so beautifully. I really felt like I was there and could smell all the critters and hear all the fair sounds — and Columbus, Ohio is a fantastic place — I love it there and fairs too! Oh, now I want corn dogs and cotton candy….
    🙂

  7. You are funny! As a child, I loved state fairs – the exhibits, carnival rides, games and cotton candy.

  8. Thanks Clare. I had a choice, New Jersey, Wisconsin and Montana also have state fairs going on. Let’s all meet at the Tilt-A-Wheel. 😉

    Hi Paris,

    Thanks for the info btw. As a child only? Perhaps a trip back in time is in order.

    Rose

    xo

  9. Rose I could practically see those nekked sheep fleeing to their pens!
    And the taste of cotton candy – I love the fluffy pink or lavender cones – oh how I wish I was on that Midway.
    Have a fantabulous Sunday,
    Frances

  10. Hi Frances, poor nekked sheep. 😦 But then we wouldn’t have socks and sweaters! Yum, foooooood!

    Patois, it’s only me. 😀 Funny punny.

    Tammy,

    Mooooo. 😉 Yes you do have a hunky pack mule. Maybe you could rent him out.

    Rose

    xo

  11. What a fun commentary! I always wanted to go to Ohio because my mom lived there…now I feel I got a “taste” of what it was like….You ARE good at reporting; I enjoyed my visit.

  12. Rose,
    Although I’ve been to many county fairs, I’ve never been to the State fair even though it’s only 2 hours away from us. It is and was a concious decision without regret…I hate crowds so….
    rel

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